Just over two years ago, I was approached to write the book, “World of Warcraft for Dummies.” Yes, those Dummies people, and yes, that WoW. Unfortunately the two companies could not come to an agreement concerning screenshots and royalties, so the project was round-filed. I was told not to discuss the project at all, but it’s been over two years so I’m going to guess it’s just not going to happen. /sniffle
What would it have looked like? It would’ve been grand, amazing, outstanding, irreverent, filled with errors and type-o’s, and basically freakin’ awesome.
Or, something like this:
Table of Contents
Introduction
About This Book
Conventions Used
How to Use this Book
What You’re Not to Read
Foolish Assumptions
How This Book Is Organized
Icons Used in This Book
Where to Go from Here
Part I. What to Know Before You Even Start
Ch.1 Understanding the Whole Concept
Ch.2 Clearing Up the Misunderstandings in Chapter 1
Ch.3 World of Warcraft and Kids: A Parent’s Miniguide
Ch.4 Loading the Game, Updates and Patches
Ch.5 Oh My Goodness, Let’s Start It!
Ch.6 Blizzard Made Movies for a Reason
Ch.7 Alliance and Horde
Ch.8 Races and Classes
Ch.9 PvP, PvE, RPPvP, EIEIO
Ch. 10 Build Your Face and Give Yourself a Good Name
Ch.11 Pick the Correct Server
Part II. Don’t Just Stand There, Do Something
Ch.12 The User Interface, aka The Screen
Ch.13 Your Keyboard, Mouse and How to Use Them
Ch.14 Options, Options Everywhere
Ch.15 The Baby-Pool Zone
Ch.16 Your First Quest!
Ch.17 They’re Your Bags, Baby!
Ch.18 The How and Why of Hitting Things
Ch.19 Experience and Leveling: Ding!
Ch.20 Hey, There are Other People Here…
Part III. How to Grow as a Person
Ch.21 The Character Panel
Ch.22 Armor and Weapons
Ch.23 Talents and Trees
Ch.24 The Spellbook
Ch.25 Stats, But No Math Involved
Ch.26 A Little Math, But Don’t Freak Out
Ch.27 Professions and Their Goodies
Ch.28 Trainers, Merchants, The Bank and The Auction House
Ch.29 Consumables: Food and Drink (Yum!)
Ch.30 A Small Glimpse of the Big, Wide World
Ch.31 Communication Methods: How to Yap
Ch.32 Vernacular: How to Talk the Talk
Ch.33 Guilds: Bringing People Together
Ch.34 Playing With People in Parties and Raids
Ch.35 Killing People For Fun and Profit
Part IV. You Know How to Start the Car, Now Let’s Race
Ch.36 Just What are Mobs, Anyway?
Ch.37 Tanking and Aggro for Metal-Heads
Ch.38 Dealing Damage Like a Pro
Ch.39 Healing and Keeping People Alive
Ch.40 Crowd-Control and Focused-Fire
Ch.41 The Tao of Threat
Ch.42 Put It All Together and Fight as a Team
Ch.43 Instances Were Made for You and Me
Ch.44 PvP Action is Fantastic!
Part V. The Part of Tens
Ch.45 Ten Ways to Customize your User Interface
Ch.46 Ten Ways to Be a Good Member of the Community
Ch.47 Ten Ways to Not Get Ripped Off
Ch.48 Ten Ways to Make Lots of Gold
Ch.49 Ten Ways to Dominate All That You See
Ch.50 Ten Outstanding Internet Resources
I’d say write it anyways, just make it an “Unofficial dummies guide”, you have a lot of useful info floating about up there.. but, with all the changes coming.. you might have to get back into wow to keep it current.
I guarantee your avid (or is it rabid?) fanbase would read (and if possible buy) anything you write. I still get a kick out of your ORI post. I have it bookmarked and re-read it constantly.
Would have bought that in a heartbeat.
That would have such a funny read! I’d even pre-order a copy.
Man, shame it never happened… what a loss to the WoW community…
I’d also buy it in a heartbeat. Maybe then I could effectively explain to my dad why this game takes up so much of my time…
OMG! Please Blizzard and you Dummies, work on getting that book written. I’ve played WoW for just about 5 years and would love to read the book. Would you put Hobbes on the cover instead of that Dummie guy?
/fingers crossed
Yuppers I’d buy it!
….Possibly the greatest book never written…
Damn shame Blizzard was so recalcitrant. Surely they could have worked a deal to get a slice of that pie, too (but probably wanted more than a slice).
Wow, they didn’t take the idea? Ha, their loss. Your name would catch many-a-fans eyes.
Like Lemil says, you’d really have to get back into WoW to do it right. The problem with a book like that for WoW is that, unless you made it extremely generic, it would only be accurate until the next patch or expansion was released.
That being said, I think there would be a definite use for it to answer questions like “Auction House? What the hell is an auction house?” or “I’m a level 62 Hunter and I heard someone talking about talent points. What are talent points?”
I can’t even imagine how fun your creative little snippets and examples would be.
What a shame! I would have bought it as well, you are such a great writer and so entertaining! Get a petition going and force them to come to terms? haha right…
OMG. It is sooo too bad this did not happen. It would have been the best one EVER and made everyone a ton of gold.
Lemil, what ORI post do you speak of?
I gotta agree with the others, best book never written! I still stop over to the BRK site every now and then, your writing style is just classic!
I would almost buy what you just posted there
no content just table of contents is funny enough.
This book would be soooo good, I’d buy it the second it came out!
Oh Daniel…patch 3.3 drops today.
Once things are smoothed out (you know, in like a week or so =P) you should come and give Arthas a taste of the business end of your barrel! You didn’t go all that way in WoW just to let Arthas escape the wrath of the baddest hunter on the planet, did you?
Please? Daniel?
/quiveringvoicewithtearineye
Just kidding, bro! The book sounded TOTALLY hillarious and those of us who are steeped in your teachings shall slay the denizens of the Icecrown Citadel such that they shall fear even a mention of the legendary BRK!
Based on how you write; I think it would be a great guide for someone who was getting started. I always looked forwards to your updates on BRK (as i do here). You know, you could always self produce and have it on a website? Sure it would take time, which you arent devoting to WoW anymore; but that’s always an idea.
More and more I regret not having had the opportunity to meet you in-game.
Cheers!
BRK write this book! lol. Best book i never read.
Loving the new site and reading about your son. Sounds like a laugh-fest around the house. lol
Miss your BRK site and useful hunter resources. You made me the hunter i am today.
Gonna take my guild and put an arrow in Arthas’ ass with your name stamped on it.
-AJ
I remember when you kept us dangling with hints about a book in progress. Too bad …
I think of you everytime I lust after a BRK1000. Never even seen it drop.
I say spell it dummiez, refer to the company as Buzzard and the game as World ‘O Warcrack. Get someone to do the art as stick figured a’la XKCD, and write it anyway.
If they ask you can always label it as a parody =)
(and yes I’d buy a copy, preferably signed)
I read your WoW blog religiously and watched most if not all of your movies even though I didn’t play a hunter as my main. Your insights into everything that was going on were absolutely priceless and totally unmatched, even now.
If the book were produced in any form, I would certainly purchase a copy as well if not more than one to give to friends.
That would be hilarious. Obviously the book itself would have to either be revised every year or so, or be very general (or leave the math general, such as “Agility makes your Hunter better”). Probably a bit o’both.
But yeah, I would have read that. Alas!
yup would have bought that in a heartbeat too. One of WoW’s biggest chink in their armor is that we have to research, research and research how to play one class. Forget having to figure out alts. When folks say they faceroll a DK it confuses me. Maybe they are a tank or a dps, as a spriest/healer they may as well be speaking a foreign language.
blizz missed out, this would have been way better than those crappy prima strategy guides. this may have *gasp* led to more sustained subscribers. lets not pretend that blizz isn’t all about making even MORE money, *cough* pandaren monk.
Oh my, I love the table of contents. Please publish a book one day!
I’m going to repeat what most people have said here: Write it anyway! A book of this sort and your writing style would blend perfectly in an amazingly organized bundle of chaos that would be perfectly accurate, informative, and entertaining. I’m also pretty sure that such a former upstanding member of the WoW community would be welcomed by Blizzard for discussion and compromise.
Please please please write an unofficial guide Daniel.
I’m not even a WOW player and I was still checking your brk site and listening to your entertaining podcasts every week for my hunter goodness
That would have been absolutely epic.
It’s no doubt a missed opportunity for both companies.
Wow, that would have been awesome. If it ever happens let me know if you need some art, I’d love to work with you on it. I’m the guy that did the “Just takin’ a break” painting of BRK. I still read you’re blog because of the humor, you’d write a great book I’d wager.
Don
Brilliant!!!
I have more books than Carter has liver pills but I’d buy that in a heartbeat and never, ever, loan it to anyone. I also rarely recommend books because I’ve learned my taste is a wee bit different than most everyone I know. I’d recommend this book before helping anyone and would also plug it on the guild web site.
/sigh…In a world of niche publishing, this never created book would have filled a huge niche.
“Hold that thought, Arthas. I gotta see what the book says about threat.”
Part 1, Chapter 9?
HILARIOUS!
OMG I want that book!!!
I agree with the others, go rogue & publish it yourself. I’d buy many for myself & friends who play (and some who don’t).
/encourage
/encourage
/encourage
Patch day.. figured i would check u out..
that is a million dollar idea by the way.. i also will preorder it
long live BRK!!!!!!
God i love this site
i too would buy this as soon as i found a place that hadn’t sold out 
Nice Daniel.
Just for that, I decided to order a venti raspberry latte.
Cheers,
Ken
It is a loss for the world.
No kidding? Damn, that would have been a best-seller.
Shame this didn’t get to happen.
Ah well – I remember something about you working on another book, right?
Right? *crosses fingers*
I don’t even play wow anymore I still want that book!
I would have bought a copy. However, now that patch 3.3 is out, and you’re not playing WoW anymore, perchance some of your information would be outdated or missing esp concerning wow interface information. Still, I bet it would have had lots of good info.
-Del
Just reading your outline was a pleasant trip through the last 2 years for me. I would have paid anything for that book when i started, but what an adventure it was stumbling through; finding someone at work who played; discovering online resources and blogs; finally getting the bones to LFG; and finding a great guild.
It brought a middle-aged guy (somewhat reluctantly) into the computer age. Who knew there was more to computers than surfing porn?
I would buy this book in a heartbeat…and one for my boyfriend so he understands what I do when he isn’t around
I came back to this post to say, if you write a book, any book, on any subject, you will have very many buyers amongst your fans, myself included.
I admit, I do not get as excited about your Daddy and RL job posts as I was about the hunter/game posts, and the Airman Howell ones. Even so, I would buy any book you wrote on parenting, cooking, military service, engineering…and even coffee. Because whatever you write, it is with humor and your own awesome style.
Surely there is something you can put into a manuscript, some passion we have possibly heard nothing about, as yet.
I think that reading the index alone would be beneficial…filling it in is the icing on the cake. The index alone would give people an idea of what they at least need to pay attention to.
(I just had a friend get to level 22 without knowing that he had to train spells.)
Would have been very funny if the parts of 10 jumped by 10..
So
Part V. The Part of Tens
Ch.50 Ten Ways to Customize your User Interface
Ch.60 Ten Ways to Be a Good Member of the Community
Ch.70 Ten Ways to Not Get Ripped Off
Ch.80 Ten Ways to Make Lots of Gold
Ch.90 Ten Ways to Dominate All That You See
Ch.100 Ten Outstanding Internet Resources
Would have been a wicked book. Your presence is missed in WoW, but understood.
LMAO, too funny. It would have been a blast to read!