10. Adobe won’t share its Rice Krispies Treats. See, Adobe’s mom made a crap-ton of RCTs, and Adobe sat on the porch and invited Apple and Microsoft over to share, but then Adobe ran in the house, slammed the screen door, and shook his kiester at ‘em.
9. H.264 has a minibike and lets Apple and Microsoft use it on the weekends, but not Adobe because he had a small “personal accident” the last time he rode it.
8. Remember when HTML5 invited everybody over to sleep in the tree house and Apple brought two Playboys and then they disappeared? Microsoft found ‘em in Adobe’s closet when they were playing Battleship on Easter.
7. Corel is a very pretty girl, and both Apple and Microsoft have been asking her out, but she picked Microsoft. Apple was cool with it, until Adobe stated talking smack about Microsoft and how he was telling Corel that Apple was saying bad things about Corel!
6. Adobe had a birthday party and asked for coconut cake, knowing Apple was allergic.
5. Adobe told that high school bully FTC that Apple was calling FTC names, so FTC took Apple’s lunch money for a month.
4. Adobe said his dad could beat up Apple’s dad, and at the little league game, Adobe’s dad got smashed and poked his finger in Apple’s dad’s face.
3. Adobe carries when playing four-square and Apple and Microsoft are tired of never being allowed to call “no-carries.”
2. Adobe had his mom’s office buy Boy Scout’s popcorn and trail mix so he could sell the most, win the contest, and get the free tickets to Sea World, while Apple and Microsoft sold their stuff from their stand on the corner of Maple and Main Street.
1. When your parents are running the 2nd and 3rd most valuable companies in the US, you’re not the retro, punk, counter-culture kids anymore; you’re the bullies, (even if you’re right…)
First!
Small typo in 7;
Apple was cool with it, until Adobe stated talking smack about Microsoft and how he was telling Corel
Overall funny post =p
Nothin better than a little bit of Adobe hating!
Love the post!
I’m actually really excited for HTML5. It looks to have amaaazing potential, and run a whole lot better. Adobe became ignorant and cocky with Flash. It’s not the only game in town anymore, and they needed to adapt, but didn’t. To be honest, I’m not that upset that my iPhone doesn’t run flash.
My (utterly unfounded except that Adobe is totally dragging its heels on developing for everybody else’s handhelds) suspicion is that Adobe has a handheld of their own coming out in the not-too-distant future. It explains so much.
Apple and Microsoft hate Adobe because they’re the only large company that actually makes smart, usable products with fantastic customer service.
…and now back to a duck eating a grapefruit.
I hate Adobe too.
Too expensive and overrated.
I think you’re overestimating the maturity level of the participants in this debate >.>
nothin to do with your post here about apple/ms/adobe, but i think u’ll enjoy this. these things are gonna change the world:
http://withoughts.tk/tech/let-there-be-memristors
Jobs/Apple has no leverage to talk about anyone else being proprietary. As far as products being expensive — both Adobe and Apple share in that practice. Frankly, I could easily do without both of them.
Hey! I got some visits from this page, and came to see what it was.
Very fun article =P haha I’m going to check the rest of the blog out.