1. Animals at a petting farm know where their bread is buttered. The signs say that they could bite, but those two donkeys would eat the grain of a newborn’s backside and not leave a mark.
2. A hayride itself is benign, but if the driver says “Whoops…” you know the party is getting started.
3. If you rent a car, get the GPS unit. Best decision of the week.
4. And get the $5/day upgrade for the Chrysler 300 with the satellite radio, too.
5. I’m from NY, and I won’t fly through NYC unless I’m being held gunpoint. Hartford rocked.
6. If you’re one of 25 retirees at the swanky hotel pool and all is quiet, but then a seven year old shows up to practice his cannonballs, you cannot be upset. It’s a pool, not a museum. Daddy is telling him not to yell, but it’s a pool for goodness sake.
7. Don’t charge me $2 for a Coke at the poolside cabana and expect me to tip you much for the burger.
8. When I order an Old Fashioned at the hotel bar and the guy blinks not once, but twice? That’s a bartender-problem, not a me-problem.
9. The hotel pub chef shouldn’t mess around with the basic recipe for pizza. The bread and cheese were amazing, but the bacon and red onions and arugula and mushrooms were too much. Simplification is a good thing.
10. A little discipline will go a long way. And that’s true in not punching the GPS unit when it says “Recaaaaaaalculating” like I screwed up. There was a concrete divider between me and the exit!
11. There is no good time to take the Throgs Neck Bridge.
12. There is never not a good time to take the Bridgeport-Port Jefferson Ferry. We were king of the world!
13. My mother lost twenty five pounds by stopping putting ice in her white wine. There’s more of a lesson here than I’m seeing, but dang if I can find it.
14. It may take years, but Karma exacts her payment eventually.
15. In-flight Internet is a big, slapping, kissable Yes. $10 is nothing; just get it.
16. The answer to “Do you want an upgrade to 1st class?” is Yes, especially when your scheduled to be slammed into a middle coach seat for two and a half hours.
17. It’s totally OK to despise the guy next to you for bringing his iPad and mocking you with its presence.
18. Apparently they make combined clothes washer-dryer units. /ponder
19. Always take the bigger piece of luggage. Always over-pack. Always take extra contact lenses. Always bring a pair of shoes you don’t think you’ll need.
20. Don’t sweat little purchases on vacation. The locker will cost $6 and the new water-shoes $15, but the memories of swimming and playing with your son at Lake Compounce will last a lifetime, and who can put a price on that.
21. OK, so don’t get the Raisin Bran and the chicken nuggets AND a Hostess cupcake on the ferry. He’s not a bottomless pit.
22. The water at Lake Compounce is maintained by keeping it stored in an Igloo cooler surrounded by liquid nitrogen. One word: C.O.L.D.
23. The pony ride is always worth the money.
24. If he wants to feed donkeys, let him feed the donkeys. But don’t let him near the emus.
24. Or the geese.
25. Now that I think about it, maybe we crashed that hayride. He did say, “Aren’t you with the group?”
26. Legos, water park, petting farm, grandma and grandpa, and lots of hugs and wrestling on a swanky hotel bed makes a good vacation, I don’t care where you live.
27. One can make friends out of any situation, and sometimes the worst situations help make the best friends.
28. If you need to kill two hours in Hartford, go to the best-looking restaurant, order the chef salad with blue cheese, and write a blog post about your vacation.
Priceless, especially the last one.
13. My mother lost twenty five pounds by stopping putting ice in her white wine. There’s more of a lesson here than I’m seeing, but dang if I can find it.
Leaving out the ice means you can taste the wine. Being able to taste the wine will lead you to drink fewer glasses. Fewer glasses is fewer calories and thus, if nothing else changes, weight loss.
Bridgeport – PJ is nice, but if you ever have the choice, take the Orient Point to New London Ferry. You miss the cute restaurants and shops in Port Jefferson, but the drive out the North Fork is always lovely, and if you have extra time, you can take in a few winery tours and tastings. Besides, the kid (you or the 7 year old) may see submarines in New London, possibly cruising on the river.
Lol, glanced at the old fashioned recipe and misread the iba approved as ‘brk approved’
Donkeys = soft muzzle
Geese, Emus = big mutant chickens with HUGE neck muscles to power the sharp beaks. Scary!
I dunno…I’ve been bitten by cranky donkeys, but for some unfathomable reason, emus love me.
Geese are feathery footballs that honk when you punt ‘em.
Nuff said!
Huzzah for a new Daniel post.
I second what Eric wrote; try to grab the Orient Point ferry next time (if you’re headed farther northeast). Much more scenic! Two other things: I’m surprised you ate that much PJ Ferry food and lived to tell about it, and I’m also surprised we didn’t see any points regarding how awesomely they pack cars/trucks/buses like sardines into spaces smaller than a hall closet on that ferry
Hunter love for north shore Long Island, hooray!
Didja ride Boulder Dash? Didja?
Sounds lovely! And to think I just got back from two weeks in your neck of the woods! (Jupiter/Cocoa Beach/Disney Cruise/Orlando).
BTW, as hot as things are here in Tucson, the weather is considerably worse in Orlando… That being said, we had an awesome time.
I wish I could get the flying to Hartford instead of LGA through to my company for when I go to CT next week…
“Leaving out the ice means you can taste the wine. Being able to taste the wine will lead you to drink fewer glasses. Fewer glasses is fewer calories and thus, if nothing else changes, weight loss.”
When I read #13 I thought, “wait, what?!” … and after reading your explanation I still have a, “wait, what?!” feeling.
I did some googling and it looks like the average dry white wine glass (4oz) has 77 calories and the average sweet white wine glass (4oz) has 103 calories.
25 lbs is 87,500 calories.
This means that in order for your explanation to be correct, the lack of ice caused her to drink between 850-1136 fewer glasses of wine. Somehow, I doubt this is the explanation.
#13. Daniel never mentioned how long it took his mother to lose the 25 lbs. For the sake of the argument though, let’s assume she lost that weight in one year.
If she was drinking 3 glasses of iced white wine every evening, but by deicing she drank just 1 glass, then she’d drink 730 fewer glasses in one year. Re: 4oz glasses, I believe that’s a ‘standard’ glass or what you would get at a restaurant or bar, whereas if you pour yourself a glass of wine at home or at a friend’s house, which is probably where you’re doing most of your drinking if you’re drinking every night, then you’re probably filling your glass with approx. 8oz of wine. Or at least I do when I pour myself a glass of wine.
If you go from drinking three 8oz glasses to just one 8oz glass per day you’re cutting out two 8oz glasses, being four ‘standard’ 4oz glasses per day, or 1460 ‘standard’ glasses per year. That’s more than enough to lose 25 pounds in one year.
I agree about that bridge – no bridge should ever go up AND turn. EVER.
To do so is an abomination , i.e http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/San_Diego_–_Coronado_Bridge
#14
So very true.
BRK was blocked at work for me finally.
So I was glad to see you posted something new on here.
Glad to hear you had a sweet vaca.
My son is due any day now, so I’ll be joining the ranks of the Fatherhood very soon.
People put ice in white wine? Seriously? Never heard that one. And what’s wrong with emus? It’s the cassowaries you need to watch out for.
Y’all are underestimating the “before” wine. Seriously.
It was 20 pounds in 8 months and Capn John wins. The wine was 9% alcohol, too sweet without lots of ice and sipped from 5pm to 10pm every night. Sobriety was never an issue but even the watered down carbs over the years were. Now I drink “real” wine but only with dinner and I eat smaller portions at dinner as well. In fact, maybe by now I HAVE lost 25 pounds. It took years to put the weight on but unless I start eating sweets (don’t like) I’m happy to have my carbs in smaller doses.
The Battle Axe has spoken.
Nice call on the C300, I drive that myself and will until the thing absolutely has to be replaced. Best car I’ve ever owned by far.
Nice post. I love donkeys by the way, and had one as a child.
Hate to leave this here but I forgot your other blog address- but have you checked out frostheim’s new hunter camouflage video? It’s so beautiful I cried- about time we were able to get the drop on those nasty pallies.
those thick and heavy borosilicate wine glasses are the best but they are very expensive `;’ *“
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